Words Forgotten

Oh how soon we forget everything that holds us up. Somehow when we have problems, all too quickly, every word of wisdom that we claim to live by is forgotten. Every positive thing that we've ever read, heard or said is replaced by how we feel at that moment. And we concentrate so hard on our feelings and pains and fears that we forget what makes us strong. This was the case with me, I found myself in an emotional place that I didn' t know how I got to. It was like suddenly there was an elephant in the room, and I had no clue how it had gotten there. Suddenly the size of my broken heart was bigger than every scripture I'd heard, every song I had sung, every piece of wisdom that I had lived by and I was consumed by a wave of sadness and lacked the strength to even try to fight the under tow. Then someone (who although I don't personally know, I count as dear to my heart accidentally reminded me of my favorite scripture Philippians 4:8

"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."

And that's when I realized all of the negative thinking I had been doing! All I was concentrating on was my hurt, my pain, my sorrow, my loneliness. None of which were good. I realized that I need to shift my focus, because even in the midst off all this chaos, God is blessing me in other areas, for example, with my money! I have a semi-new job that I work 30 hrs a week at and another job (at forever 21!!!! yes!!) that I work at part time, So I have more income than ever. So I'm thinking that now while I'm dealing with all this other stuff and all these emotions and whatever else, that I'll buy/do things that I was not able to do before I had money. For one, I want to sponsor a world vision child, get a digital camera (or video camera that can take pictures too) so I can start putting up videos on Youtube. I can finally get the fancy Tea that I like, and ho knows what else I can do. But the point is that I should be concentrating on God, and all the good things that I have right now. Especially right now.

Reality check, the only reality that really counts, is the one that God says I can have. And he says that I can have joy that no man can take, so who am I to give it away??? EXACTLY.